The Big Purse via Diane Kruger for Chanel - Huffington Post
Remember that time when my purse started to fart? And it kept on farting?
In public?
True story. My purse had flatulence.
I was wandering aimlessly through Blockbuster (you know, where we used to rent movies?), hoping to find something suitably entertaining. And that's when the farts started.
That's right. My bag farted.
Again and again. Loud, juicy "phhhhhts" of extruded gas.
I looked down at the bloated handbag hanging from my shoulder, and knew immediately what had caused its gas.
One aisle over, doubled over in laughter, was Grayson (age 14 at the time). In his hand was a small remote with a button for activating a little portable machine which he had recently acquired at the church garage sale.
A remote-controlled Fart Machine.
Which he'd secretly placed in my purse. (What is it with boys and bodily function jokes?)
"It's going off by itself! I swear!" he said through his laughter. "Look!" He held out his palm and the fart sounds just kept on rolling from my purse without his thumb touching the button.
I couldn't help it....I started laughing with him and we had to hang on to the DVD racks to keep from falling over. With each new "phhhhhhht" we tried to suppress our giggles, which only made it funnier. We exited Blockbuster without a shred of dignity.
My purse lost a bit of weight when I took the guilty machine out, but even now it's far too overweight for its bone structure. It just keeps eating things like paper and receipts, and you KNOW what too much fiber will do. A slimmed-down purse is far more attractive and much less likely to have gas.
If you're feeling overwhelmed with life in general,
and you're gasping for some fresh air but don't know where to start....then start with your purse. Today.
Give it a detox, a "cleanse."
A flush, if you will.
Today's Small Thing is to help your purse shed some weight by cleaning it out.
Reduce the excess tonnage by removing everything but the bare essentials. Try using small ziplocks to contain things like cosmetics or other small items. I'd say it's time to let the receipts from Christmas go. I will remove the business cards I collected from a conference in October. That should help.
CONFESSION TIME! What is the oddest, oldest or most useless thing in your purse? GO!