Home Sanctuary

Autumn Sweeps In

Oh, how I love Autumn!  It's not just because my daughters have beautiful "Autumn" complexions and hair.

(This is a thinly veiled excuse to post a photo of my girls.)

 This photo is from a couple of Autumns ago. It's one of my favorites.

I love Fall mostly because the crisp air makes me feel invigorated. I did a cartwheel the other morning, just just because I was THINKING about fall weather. I can't wait to put pumpkins and mums out, even though I know it will be awhile before that crisp air gets here!

But the north wind (not yet cool) has started to bring leaves and grass and sticks from Canada (Alright, Oklahoma) right to my front porch. (Well, it's the back porch, really, so we generally just call it "The Breezeway.")

The Breezeway gets to be more like a wind tunnel sometimes, and it's hard to keep it looking nice. Plus we've had an invasion of spider webs that are icky, so very icky.

Today's Small Thing is to simply sweep your front porch, stoop or walkway.    I'm completely aware that it's a losing battle, but we've gotta fight on until winter, girls!  Away with you, crumbly leaves!  Be gone! Death to spiders!

This is a pretty easy job.  So easy, you could get one of your children to learn some responsibility and do it for you! :) Sometimes easy jobs are just enough to raise your spirits and make you turn cartwheels!

Song of the Day: Autumn Leaves, Nat King Cole of course!

Now, cooler weather also makes me want to drink hot liquids. How about some Company Girl Coffee? If you'd like a chance to join a fun little meme today, simply link your blog below. Then stop in and visit the other lovely Company Girls who are participating! Even if you aren't a blogger with a link, why not

pop in on some of the other blogs to say hello! It's easy and fun...and opens a whole new world of friendship.

Glass Half Full

You know, some people are naturally positive and chipper. But if you are a parent, you know that other people are born with a "glass half empty" mentality right out of the chute. It's frustrating to deal with negative attitudes, especially in children.  One of mine was particularly sure that the world was out to get him and that all the cards were stacked against him. Every day. All the time.

I really got sick of constantly pointing out the positive and insisting on contentedness as a character trait.  We had to make a happy disposition a matter of obedience just to keep the spirit of glumness from overtaking our household at times.

But just like Galatians 6:9 says, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up," cultivating a positive outlook will have its rewards. I believe that seeing the glass half full is something that can be nurtured and trained, and we have certainly reaped a harvest of good attitudes in all our kids. I'm really proud of the way they are able to handle adversity and difficulties; even my "glass half empty" child has overcome his natural tendencies and sees life a whole lot differently than he used to. He is an extremely positive person! Wow.

Learning to have a positive attitude is a gift we can give our children...and is a gift we can give ourselves.  Oftentimes, we grumble and complain about things that we cannot change, or things that grumbling and complaining about will not ever change. The words that leave our mouths do nothing to positively affect our situation, and only serve to bring down the whole house.

Today's Small Thing is to speak positive words. Alright, that's not exactly a SMALL thing, but practice clapping a hand over your mouth (literally or figuratively) when something negative threatens to pop out. Can you put a positive spin on things? Make a game out of taking a complaint and making it constructive.  Try pulling your kids into the action and help them be aware of their own words.

Reap a harvest of joy when you speak positively. Can you make it a whole day without complaining? Maybe not, but you'll see results immediately when you try. Think of it like learning a new skill: it takes time, but eventually you will master it.

How about you? Do you deal with grumpy children? How do you handle negative words? Are you aware of your own negative words? How can you change your conversation habits?

Song of the Day: Jesus, Speak to Me, Audio Adrenaline

Household Schedules for Pathetic Schedulers

I freely admit: I am a pathetic scheduler. 

I prefer to think of myself as a "free spirit," a "joyful creator," a "flexible need-meeter."

In other words, it's real easy for me to spend most of my time day dreaming and whistling dixie, rather than getting down to business and keeping a regular schedule. This can (and has been) a problem when it comes to maintaining the house and feeding children on a daily basis. What happens is, I play around until there is a crisis point: the house is a disaster, there is no food in the fridge, the laundry is overflowing, and someone needs a science project done by morning. 

That's when I get serious.

That's when I pull out my "Real World" schedule and start to dig my way out.

You know, we reviewed the process of schedule-making not long ago - in August. But I'm finding that what I *thought* would work....well, it ain't really workin' for me. So I'm back to the drawing board and figuring out what WILL work. Maybe you're right there with me, now that school is underway and you've had a chance to have a few meltdowns of your own.

Did you miss this tried-and-true, fantastically inspiring post? Let me direct you back to this one - the source for scheduling greatness:

How to make a housekeeping schedule

No matter how many times I read the ground rules above, I ALWAYS come away encouraged. I guess in-between-times I start to overcomplicate things in my head - and just listening to the calm voice of reason is reassuring. Yes, I can do this....again.

If you are feeling like a pathetic failure in this whole mommy/home management/wifey thing, allow me to just set you down for a minute and say this:

You are not a failure.

You are exactly who God made you to be. You must believe that you are uniquely gifted to meet your family's needs. Don't let the Pinterest boards, your Facebook friends' achievements, and organizing blogs make you feel "less than" the beautiful woman, mom, wife and home manager that you are. Life is full of messes - some of them glorious - and simply because you're in the middle of one does not mean that you have failed or will never succeed at this. My home and family are proof that things don't have to be perfect in order to be joyful and peaceful. Keep filling your heart with hope, and keep taking little steps each day. You're in this for the long haul and you're a work in process! Lighten up and tell yourself that you're going to make it....beautifully.

Today's Small Thing is to pour yourself a cup of coffee and take a look at the things that are - and aren't - working for you. Print off a "Real World" schedule and see if you can plug a few things in.

Take a load off of today's burden and schedule some of the work throughout the rest of the week. If you just take care of today's work, tomorrow's will be there when you get to it. Each day, just get up and peck away at creating something that works for you.

Do you have a schedule that works for you? What tasks do you find difficult to schedule? Do you have some tricks that you've learned along the way that help you get things done?

Emptiness

Emptiness.

The hollow, aching void that penetrates my soul with palpable nothingness. It beckons me into its abyss of vacuity, and seduces me with its barren allure of desolation.

Is it strange that I enjoy it so much?

Maybe it's my "dark side," but I find emptiness quite mesmerizing.

Empty dishwashers.

Empty clothes hampers.

Empty dryers.

Empty trash cans.

Empty recycling bins.

Empty eyes. (just kidding.)

Empty sinks.

Empty purses (not wallets!)

Empty coat pockets.

Empty desktops. And desk tops.

Empty baskets.

It really makes my heart full when I see any of these things, bereft of stuff.

Today's Small Thing takes "emptiness" to a whole new level of beautiful barrenness. Unload, dismantle, pour our, unpack or otherwise emptify any recepticle to return it to its vacuous state of purity.

Empty.

Can you empty seven things? Eight? Who can empty ten?

What will you empty today? Did I miss anything on my list?

Song of the Day: Your Heart is an Empty Room, Death Cab for Cutie

Tea Towel Inspirations

I love vintage tea towels! My mother and grandmothers always had great stashes of these handmade creations...and I would love to pick up the tradition and make some of my own.

One of the sets I remember best was the "Days of the Week" set of dish towels. I found a photo of a similar set here:

The ladies of days gone by had a great idea: designate certain chores to certain days of the week. And while some of their chores may seem old-fashioned, there is something charming about the simplicity of it all. I'm inspired by their vintage work styles to simplify my week as much as I can.

Today's Small Thing is to take a cue from our grandmothers and do some washing on Monday.

You might have a busy day already planned, but if you're like me, you always have a load that is sitting there, waiting to be done. Give a prayer of thanks that we don't have to heat buckets of water or operate old-timey ringer wash machines....we can simply toss in a load and do other things while we let our modern machines do all the work!

Is Monday a good day for you to consider "Wash Day?" Or is there another day that would work better? Can you put aside a few hours in one evening or one particular day to get it all done...or does it work better for you to do a load per day?

Hey, laundry is a fact of life. Clean clothes keep the family looking good and feeling confident! Wash what you can today....and then take a look at your weekly schedule and find a time that works best for you to tackle this chore regularly! Designating a "laundry day" takes so much stress out of life - try it and see.

Song of the Day: Suds in the Bucket, Sara Evans

Back on Track

I really didn't think the past few months would be like this - so out of the ordinary. For people who rarely travel, we found ourselves gone for weeks at a time as we did a project out of state and took a vacation at the end of it. Let me just say how much I appreciate each of you Company Girls for hanging in there with me while I racked up one prolonged absence after another! I realize that ya'll have busy lives and I am blessed by your faithful company each day.

It feels good to be back to "normal," which for me is trying to figure out the best way to get around work so I can have fun. Some things never change.

Sidenote: my husband and I once took personality quizzes that summed up our work styles. His was "Let's do the work the right way." Mine was "Let's make the work fun." We were pegged, man.

Whether you are into the first few weeks of the kids' school, starting a new job, beginning a work project, dealing with toddlers or cleaning up after a puppy, it seems like there is always something that throws a monkey wrench into our best-laid plans. Days never really go as planned and it's easy to throw in the towel on organization, and things like personal hygiene. You start thinking, "what does it matter, really, if no one can find a place to sit in the living room because of all the clutter? It's just stuff - our stuff - and we're comfortable on the floor." You start to rationalize cereal for dinner (good source of fiber), mismatched socks (style statement), and children wearing PJ's all day because they can't find anything clean (it's good to be relaxed). You start to feel a little bit of satisfaction in your non-conformist, anti-June Cleaver lifestyle, but deep in your heart you know that life wasn't meant to be a free-for-all mess like this. You wish you could find things easily, and whip together a meal that didn't come out of a fast-food bag. You wish your home looked company-ready more than just once a year.

Let's get back on track together, shall we?

First. Let's decide that we CAN do better. It doesn't have to be a LOT better, just better. We can do this...it won't take MUCH, but it will take something. You on for this?

Next. Let's procrastinate "real" organization until next week, when we can break down a simple schedule and talk about meal planning. If these two subjects cause you to break out in hives, relax. All we are really going to do is set up some basic structure so you can have MORE FUN. This is why my systems work. And you get to put it off for a few more days.

BUT.....

Today's Small Thing is to do one thing better than you think you can. 

Take a little step of "betterness." Eat your KFC Chicken at the table....instead of in front of the TV as you normally would. Send a real card (with a stamp) instead of an email. Vacuum the living room instead of stopping with a clutter pick up. Read a bedtime story to your child instead of a just a quick kiss goodnight. Unload the dishwasher, sweep the porch, flirt with your husband even if he's grumpy....simply decide to take ONE THING a notch further than you usually do.

BE the kind of woman you want to be....in one small way today. Think "I can do this one thing just a little bit better," and then do it. You'll find that, in the few seconds it takes to add a dash of intentional purpose, life will start to sparkle.  And we love sparkley things, don't we?? This is gonna be fun!

What will you do better today?? I'd love to know!

 

If you'd like to link up for "coffee" here is the linkytool! Company Girl Coffee is an easy way to meet new bloggers and share your own blog. Simply add your blog post link below and then get out and visit the other blogs that are participating. Even if you don't link up, I hope you'll stop in and visit these fabulous ladies anyway! It's a great way to expand your circle!

Yes, It's Possible

I asked my husband once why he had dreamed of climbing Mt. Everest when he was a young man.

"I don't know," he said thoughtfully. "Maybe because it's POSSIBLE."

It's possible because a man named Sir Edmund Hillary proved it is. He and his companion Tenzing Norgay did what no one had ever done...and opened the way for climbers and dreamers to make it to the top of the world because it COULD be done. And while most people see the failed attempts at Everest as reason not to try, for some undaunted souls, the fact that some HAVE made it is enough for them to embark on the journey of a lifetime.

Last week, Tom and I felt as if we'd made it to the top of Everest. You see, we had a "second honeymoon" in the very area we'd spent our first one - in the mountains of Colorado....and this time we had a vantage point that allowed us to look back and see the climb we've been on. In the scramble to the top - getting our last child out the door and finishing a huge work project - we suddenly realized that the possibilities we'd only dreamed of in the beginning had become a reality. It was unbelievably exhilarating, and we acted just as giddy together as we did the first time around!

 

Yup, just as giddy.

Back when we were a couple of kids in a Datsun pickup on our way to Breckenridge in 1983, we had a lot of hope and just enough courage to believe that we could make it on our own epic journey. Unfortunately, we saw a lot of attempts by others that didn't end well. Marriages that started out strong but fell victim to storms, fatigue or injury along the way. Each casualty put a small measure of fear in our hearts, knowing how easily it could happen to us. That could be us, we'd say. Don't let it be us.

So we grabbed hands and just pressed on. Through college classes, babies, sicknesses, the shoulder pads and perms of the 90's, through the kids' school years, the failed businesses, the empty bank accounts and flat tires. Thankfully, along the steep path there have been enough sunsets and flowers, tea parties and sand castles, knowing smiles and inside jokes to make each step seem doable. Possible.

With each step, we learned what IS possible. And I hold up the Flag of Possibility for you today so that you can believe, and take another step yourself...no matter how faltering it may be. Keep pressing on.

It is possible.... to have an epic love affair with the person you are married to.

It is possible to re-ignite your passion for one another, even after a long, bleak season.

It is possible to make it through financial stress, parenting, illness and loss. It is possible to be faithful to your spouse.

It is possible to forgive.

It is possible to raise children who don't rebel.

It is possible to send children to public school and see them remain not only true to their faith, but be leaders of their peers.

It is possible to have a good family in spite of the mom being easily distracted by clouds, butterflies and 20% off discount signs.

It is possible that being organized is overrated.

It is possible to know that God is deeply in love with you, and cares for you....infinitely.

It is possible to enjoy your kids' teenage years.

It is possible that your really naughty, exasperating toddler will become an amazing young adult.

It is possible to trick people into thinking you're an awesome housekeeper by occasionally hiding clutter in closets.

It is possible to find small nuggets of joy each day, if you take the time to look for them.

It is possible to live for Jesus and still have a regular job.

It is *possible* to multi-task, but *probably* not well.

It is possible to enjoy each season of life, especially when you realize that none of them lasts forever.

It is possible for dreams to come true if you're willing to work.

It is possible to be a late bloomer.

It is possible that you'll face some really hard things that will defy explanation and easy answers.

It is possible for a family to love being together.

It is possible for a marriage to last forever - and still be sweet.

It is possible to reach the top of a mountain, one small step at a time.

 

What are YOUR possiblities? Maybe you're in a tough spot and it's hard to see any around you. I know just what that feels like, because I've been there, many times. And yet, here I am....looking back and seeing just how many possibilities actually became realities. God is faithful and is always working behind the scenes to give you strength for the journey.

Today's Small Thing is to grab a handful of hope and take a deep breath of courage.

With each step you take, you are that much closer to the top of your mountain. Knowing that others have gone before you - and made it - proves that it CAN be done. It IS possible...and you're on your way to planting your own flag at the summit, I promise. Keep fighting for your marriage, keep looking for moments of joy, keep on being a good mom today. Keep dreaming and praying and doing. Matt. 19:26 "but with God, all things are possible."

It is possible that the best is yet to come.

Colorado!

Hey there, Company Girls!

I'm writing today from a local Starbucks, the only spot with wifi around here. Internet access has been such a challenge over the last couple of weeks that I quit trying. I thought I'd better check in this morning and let you know that I'm still alive and kicking. :)

Photo proof:

Me, in Frisco CO.

We finished our project at Andrew Wommack Ministries.....well, at least enough for them to do their first taping last Friday. I am dying to show pics but since the first programs don't air until November, I don't want to spill their beans for them. It was a ton of work, with the last couple of days being 16 hour days...needless to say we were tired - but happy - by the end. The set looks incredible and I think everyone was excited about how it turned out!

You can see a little bit of the set behind us...ssshhhh! Tom and I got to meet Andrew in person and we were so impressed with him! Genuine, kind, personable...and a great Bible teacher.

From Colorado Springs, we made our way up to the Vail area on Saturday, and are now enjoying our first "real" vacation in a long, long time. I'm not proud of this, but Tom and I figured out that the last time the two of us went away together was before our (now college age) son was born - about 20 years ago! Now, that's just WRONG. What were we thinking??

We will be here for the rest of this week, just enjoying our time and taking in the scenery. The aspens are turning and the weather is gorgeous....it is the perfect way to kick off our "empty nest" season! We've bought notebooks for scribbling our thoughts and dreams for the future and are loving each moment.

I am savoring. I'm lingering, meditating and soaking in the beauty of the changing season. Maybe it's the leaves that are turning golden and firey before my eyes, but my heart is filled with gratitude for God's faithfulness and steady hand in the midst of change. There is wonder and hope for the future, and thankfulness for our history.

It's incredible to be here - in this moment - with the guy I started out with...and feel the goodness of it all. Wow.