I was wandering aimlessly through Blockbuster, hoping to find something suitably entertaining, when my purse began to fart.
That's right. It farted.
Again and again. Loud, juicy "phhhhhts" of extruded gas.
I looked down at the bloated bag hanging from my shoulder, and knew immediately what had caused its flatulence.
One aisle over, doubled over in laughter, was my son (age 14). In his hand was a small remote with a button for activating a little portable machine which he had recently acquired at the church garage sale.
A remote-controlled Fart Machine.
Which he'd secretly placed in my purse.
"It's going off by itself! I swear!" he said through his laughter. "Look!" He held out his palm and the fart sounds just kept on rolling from my purse without his thumb touching the button.
I couldn't help it....I started laughing with him and we had to hang on to the DVD racks to keep from falling over. With each new "phhhhhhht" we tried to suppress our giggles, which only made it funnier. We exited Blockbuster without a shred of dignity.
My purse lost a bit of weight when I took the guilty machine out, but it's still far too overweight for its bone structure. It just keeps eating things like paper and receipts, and you KNOW what too much fiber will do. A slimmed-down purse is far more attractive and much less likely to have gas.
Today's Small Thing is to help your purse shed some weight by cleaning it out. Reduce the excess tonnage by removing everything but the bare essentials. Try using small ziplocks to contain things like cosmetics or other small items. I'd say it's time to let the receipts from Christmas go.
POINTS: 40 for avoiding Purse Flatulence by nipping bloating in the bud
